Monday, September 13, 2010

Anything goes but don't blink you might miss

Last night was a blast!

Hot and Dangerous Bear on his Guard Shark.
These are definitely deadly waters, boys.
It seems my relationship with Rocky continues to be one that breaks new ground in so many ways.  After all those years, with the way our lives were moving as separate journeys in the past, one would have thought we would have seen everything there is to be seen.  Then a night like last night comes along and shows you how much more there is in our lives together to celebrate as a couple.


Last night, my partner and I along with our good musically-inclined friend hit O bar for another night of dance-able music, caffeinated beer, and campy fun!  Boy did last night deliver!  Rest assured tonight was a nice of quotable quotes, with my favorite one flowing in this manner:


"So, do you still think I made a mistake getting married so soon?"

"No, definitely not at all.  I'm now rethinking my lifestyle."


And in many ways, that quote captures how wonderful the night was.   While we both indulged in respectable levels of excess, our loyalties to one another never wavered, and once again the richness and strength of a strong and passionate relationship were again visible for all to see.   Visible enough for one to admit that a lifestyle of just one-night stands does not compare.
Not quite what I wanted to use,
but it is close enough I guess. 
I recall someone once attempting to "enlighten" me by telling me about how a relationship is nothing but a gilded cage.  There was another person who tried to question the strength of our commitment to one another, musing about us merely hanging on to each other with spider threads.  It can be sad how there really are people who are so against the idea of loyalty and relationships that they would have to spend much of their own time futilely attempting to erode a happy couple's life together.  But I guess one has to accept the fact that such people really exist.  To quote Fleetwood Mac, "Players only love you when they're playing."


(On a side note, as I type this, my Facebook account is having some weird quirk keeping me from accessing pages and even my own profile page.  While I'd like to think this was just some ISP related issue, the fact that my partner can freely surf on our wifi connection reinforces the fear that this may be another one of my "haters" activities.  I do hope I'm just being paranoid and this is some internal quirk on Facebook's side.)


Good show.  Just makes me wonder where its heart really is.
I wonder why the concept of a loyal stable relationship frightens so many people?  Part of me thinks it is in a great part the fault of shows like Queer as Folk which sensationalized and popularized the idea that a slutty, sex-focused life is the only viable life a queer can ever embrace.  The idea that relationships are pointless since love is nothing compared to the next throbbing boner that comes your way was epitomized by Gale Harold's character Brian Kinney.  It doesn't help that his motto embraces the idea that all straight people are out to hate us queers.   God knows I hate Brian and his shallowness.  He does have some level of depth, but his lack of willingness to embrace honesty just makes him less tragic and more pathetic in my eyes.  I wonder at times what Russel T. Davies had hoped to achieve by having Brian as the lead character in that show.   His Dr. Who episodes are sheer genius and represent the strength of human virtues in so many ways.   Was QAF merely his "release" of the baser things that define us?  Was there supposed to be a great "shift" in Brian's character that was due to come on the sixth season that never happened?  The American broadcast of the show had a disclaimer that read:


"Queer as Folk is a celebration of the lives and passions of a group of gay friends.
It is not meant to reflect all of gay society"


I can't help but wonder if so many people who despise relationships failed to read that particular disclaimer.  Part of me can't help but feel that as wonderfully real and touching the stories are in Queer as Folk, I would have hoped to have greater examples of the strength of committed gay relationships present in television.  Modern Family tries to do this, albeit in a funny way.  Four Weddings and a Funeral beautifully reflected a gay relationship without even having to declare the word, "gay."   I'm still having mixed feelings about Glee, since Curt seems to be too much of a show favorite at times, with his supposed demands for being accepted trampling over the rights of other people to have personal space.  Why I loved the way they portrayed how his father dealt with his coming out, I feel the show was a tad too biased when Curt's imposition of sharing a room with (the man he lusts for) his "brother" Finn lead to Finn demanding for personal space, but rather than showing how Curt was going too far, the show focused on Finn's outburst with the use of a "bad word."
The most non-stereotype gay couple on film ever.
Understandably, one can look at things in another perspective and ask, "Why should one define a successful relationship based on the Hollywood model of a happy straight relationship?  Why should the idea of one's life being a romantic comedy blockbuster be better than a sexually charged QAF episode?"   But the thing is, I'm not going for a Hollywood relationship.  I'm not looking for the happily ever after such movies claim to exist.  I'm not so immature to believe love literally conquers all.  


I do, however, believe that with everything is the act of making a choice.
And the choice to make a relationship work is a choice we all have the right to make.

Those who see a prison obviously mistake guarding something valuable as putting it in a cage.
Choosing to be in a relationship is not about choosing to be imprisoned.  Or choosing to live a boring life.  Oh no.  If anything, last night proves that a relationship that is strong and absolutely secure in its foundations can rock the night away with tongues waggling and eyes envious for more.


Last night was, simply put, Wow.
And let me tell you, no one is luckier than I was last night.
Why?





Because I am Rocky's.
And he is mine.


I found you.

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