Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Guess what, it gets EVEN BETTER.

I love you, Rocky Sunico.

These are not engagement rings or wedding rings.
But they do hold meaning in our commitment as partners.
Every day just keeps getting better.

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

I'm Better than I've Ever Been. Can you say the same?

Christmas has just zoomed passed us and in a few more days 2010 will be bidding us farewell.  Who would have thought time can move so quickly when you are having this much fun.  To be honest, I still find myself at times pinching myself to make sure I'm not caught in a dream or lost in some food-induced ecstatic vision.  The number of things that I had accomplished in this year alone are quite overwhelming, to be honest.  It was almost as if I had been stagnating for so long and had never really noticed it.

Merry Christmas from us!
But I guess life is really like that.  There are the ups and downs, the zig zags and the u-turns, the humps and the rapid roads that fast-track us through what we are meant to experience.  There are the scenic routes and the dumpy boring ones.  There are the long agonizing treks that move past galleries of regrets and frustrations.  And there are the wonderful stop overs that are there to remind you, "Hey you deserve this!" that quietly then hitch along for a ride as you go through your life.

Life is like Inception.

Let's face it:  Life can be challenging enough as it is.   From academic to economic expectations, dealing with the pressures of school and work are already a lot for some people.   Add to that the pressures from siblings, friends, and parents who all (well, at least the real ones) really just want was is best for you.    Then finally, add the delicate act of sharing and yet respecting boundaries that is necessary for a relationship to remain healthy and not dip into either obsession or abuse.  Life is pretty challenging enough as it is.

Add to that the discrimination from both others and one's peers for being gay.
And for being a geek.
Trust me, you guys have it easier :-P
And trust me, it can be a far greater challenge than most would expect.

But in many ways, this never-ending challenge of embracing one's true self, and celebrating it with the world, is what makes life worth living.  It is only when one is able to say, "Hey, look!  This is me and I love being me!" can one start to honestly consider finding that special someone else whom one can share one's life with.  Cause one has to be very careful out there.  There are a lot of predators, users, and abusers out there who would not really feel any moral obligation to care about how easily they manipulate your naïveté to their advantage.   A large part of knowing how to avoid such people is to learn to trust yourself first and to love yourself for who you are.   Once you do, the adage like-attracts-like easily comes into play and before you know it, you will find someone who "gets" you as much as you "get" him too.

Really.  No.  Don't go there.
So yes, 2011 is inching its way closer with barely a week left of time remaining.  Lots of people talk about having a "resolution" this new year.  Others mumble about trying to accomplish a list of goals.  Me?  I think what would be best is to review one's life and consider what one has done to be both oneself and at the same time an even better version of oneself.    Others might be content to judge the joy in the lives by the branded things they buy, or the free trips out-of-town they connive out of others... don't mislead yourself into thinking they have it "better".  After all, all they've done is measure the quality of their lives on financial means.  Celebrate being you and celebrating always becoming even a better you each and every single day!

Year of the Rabbit is coming up!
Here's to another year filled with real rainbows that color the sky!

*Thanks to my partner Rocky for some of the pictures!

George Washington
Associate yourself with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation. It is better be alone than in bad company.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Geekwood: Tom Strong

Once again, from the realm of comic books comes another entry for this blog's Geekwood.  Most of the time,  we find a guy who is smart, or strong, or handsome, or beautifully built.  If we're lucky, we get someone who captures two of the four qualities.  Maybe even three.  But rare is there a man who captures all four, and is socially skilled to boot.

Tom Strong is the creation of Alan Moore (Watchmen, V for Vendetta) and Chris Sprouse (Legionnaires).  Unlike most superheroes whose powers greatly define who they are, Tom Strong is a science hero in the vein of a modernized pulp hero.  He uses everything from his incredible intellect, super-science gadgets, total body control and clear undeniable logic to defeat his many enemies who tend to be nods towards various comic genres.

While Tom Strong might not be as popular as Superman or Spider-man, his approach to defeating his villains is always an entertaining read.  The comics show him doing everything from talking down an otherworldly digital construct to trading another planet for the salvation of the Earth.   Each issue an interesting read by itself!  But even more fun are the cast of characters that join him in his exploits, from his wife Dhalua, to his daughter Tesla, his gorilla companion King Solomon, and his loyal servant Pneuman.

 Of course, I can't deny that Tom Strong has massive bonus points for being one of the rare comic characters who proudly cultivates a healthy growth of chest fuzz.  Most comic characters seem to prefer shaving themselves to a more pre-pubescent look.  Tom Strong, however, proudly shows the strength of his testosterone.

There was even an issue where the explore a future version of Tom Strong, and yes, age has done little to bring down this man's hotness.  Even if his hair had grown white, his body remains at the peak of delicious fitness and his fuzziness even more so.

And of course, what comic that embraces the pulp era would fail to have its own share of bondage moments?  There also are issues where our good yummy Tom finds himself fighting against tentacle-like horrors or struggling against bukake-esque monstrosities.. but I think I best leave that for you readers to find the issues and experience the visuals on your won.

But definitely, this married man is off limits save for us adoring his heroic exploits.  I mean, let's be frank here, he already has a daughter.  Superman only accomplished that when an openly gay director was given the rights to handle his development.  Yep, we gay guys are needed to remind them breeders to breed at times.

So with all that, Tom Strong wins a place in this blog's Geekwood entries.  Admitted, he might not be the chunky bulk most bears are, nor the much more hirsute forest grizzlies can get, his massive guns, and even larger intelligence easy shoo him into the world of comic hunks that deserve to be noticed.  

Check out Tom Strong when you can!  With 36 issues out there with each one absolutely worth reading, I highly recommend you head for your nearest bookstore or comic shop and treat yourself to a four-color experience that tickles both your brain and your... other bone.

Take home your own Tom Strong now!
Or sleep soundly with original Tom Strong artwork on your walls!

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

I thought you guys were braver than this

The Philippines recently had its annual Gay Pride March and much to my dismay, I was not able to take part in it this year.  My partner and I had been looking forward to taking part in it for months after experiencing the excitement and pride of being part of something meaningful last year.  Unfortunately, my parents decided that the same weekend was to be a good weekend to fly to Singapore to celebrate my sister's birthday.  So like a good recently outed gay son, I decided to do my share in being part of the family and joined them for the trip.

Last year with my other friends.
Being able to take part in an event that allows you to celebrate being yourself is something I honestly wish more people get a chance to experience.  While coming out is a personal journey in every gay person's life, stepping outside to join the Pride March is a call for courage and the willingness to make a statement.  A statement that says, "We are who we are and we are not ashamed."  And as ironic as it sounds, taking part of the march while wearing a mask since one might still be in the closet is quite welcome.   Just as much as any straight friend joining the march to support their gay friends.   The march, after all, isn't about just being gay.  It is about celebrating the fact as diverse as we all are, we are happy to be who we are.

I remember how excited I was last year to join the Pride March.  I wasn't out to my family.  While most of my co-workers and friends knew I wasn't walking the "straight" path, few neighbors or family friends were aware of my preferences.   But I admired the courage of those who had been part of the march year after year and realized in many ways it was more than just a chance to show off one's gayest costume (like some do).  In fact, those who showed off their gayest costumes were simply doing something I was, back then, afraid to do:  Just be myself and have fun.

My partner and me in our matching black Trek shirts
My partner and I decided to join the march wearing our black Star Trek shirts to celebrate our unity as a couple and as geeks.    And even if I was still in the closet family-wise, I threw away all fears of being discovered and walked with my face clearly visible for all to see.

And experienced very quickly all the hate and bigotry that certain members of society had for me.

They were at the corners, with their banners and placards condemning us for being who we were.  Calling us vile things.  Speaking into their loudspeakers cruel and wicked words.    They used the Lord's name in vain.  They used the Bible as a personal weapon.   And they said WE were the one's who had lost our way.

So much hate from people claiming to love God.
It was the first time they have ever seen me, and they hated me down to the very core of my being.

Some of our friends retaliated.

They made their own posters.  They chanted their own slogans.  They yelled back.  Or sang.  Or threw jokes back.  Insults too.   But all they did was encourage the hate even more.  Fan the flames stronger.  Fed the evil that called itself good.

I felt it was a sad reminder of how people still believed we were best invisible.
Or non-existent.

And even worse was when I heard from people I consider my friends the similar themes of hate.

One facebook friend wrote about the Pride March not representing him since it merely showcased freaks.  Another proudly shared how he was invited to the March but felt it was all just politics.   Was that really how bad it get's here in the Philippines?  That the discrimination ran so deep, rather than take part to BE represented, we would rather insult and demean those who clearly showed a courage superior to our own?   That we would dismiss the march as merely something political, when in fact, it WAS political for the right reasons.  It was political because we deserve to be acknowledged.  We deserve to be recognized.  We deserve to be accepted.  We aren't even seen as mere equals.  It wasn't a call for special treatment.  It was a call to be identified as real.  Damn right it was political!

Yes, it felt so much like this.
How sad, therefore, that its urgency is so easily dismissed and thrown aside.

There I was, stick in Singapore, wishing I could be part of it, and here were friends of mine so content with their own personal concerns that the idea of being part of something bigger felt... unimportant.

It was insulting.  It was depressing.
It nearly drove me to disassociate myself with them.
Who needs friends who don't see the point in seeing you to the very least as equals.
More so when they themselves were gay.

Of course, when it comes to the "other" annual big gay event, the so-called White Party attendance shoots up and celebrations are explosively present.  When it comes to bathhouses and models strutting around in badly designed underwear, you have throes of gay men screaming their tonsils out.   Clearly sex sells.

2010 March Route.  How I wish I was here!
And yet, we are all aware of how much we DO need a political voice.  We read of updates where gay people are arrested in raids as prostitutes merely for having a condom in their possession.  Or of how one's sexuality is too quickly used to judge one's capacity to work, or be a functional member of a family.    The Catholic Bishops' Conference in the Philippines (or as it is more known as, the CBCP) proclaims condoms as a cause of cancer, and refers to 'active homosexuals" as having "victims" as if we were all sexual predators.  Not to mention the undocumented numerous cases of bullying.  Of beatings.  Of all these many forms of discrimination.

Things need to change.
And we need to do our part.

The March to the very least shows we are not afraid.

So I challenge you gay guys out there in Manila.    Stop being content with hiding.    Stop thinking you aren't part of something bigger.   Take that step.  Join the March.

Make a difference.
Be represented by being there to represent yourself.

We can fill the world with rainbows.
We can help make it a better place.

thanks to my partner Rocky for most of the pictures of last year's Pride March.
I promise, 2011, I will do all I can to be with you when we attend it.

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

On the topic of delectable dots and biological buttons

Your nipple is an island of pleasure.

A solitary haven
thrusting towards the sky from a sea
the color of silken coffee.  

There are tiny creases upon it;

like the fine lines upon one's lips
that whisper of secret things.

Unlike the bashful mimosa
it yearns for my touch
and hardens from the slightest contact.

Your nipple is an island
And my mouth, the coming tsunami.


Then soothing silent calm.

(time to visit the other one)

by tobie

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