Pride 2014

It is Pride month again and Rocky and I decided to show our love to O bar by creating a bunch of "posters" for the upcoming pride event.

Will you join us there this year?

Check it out:
http://www.baduypride.com/

Worth a read

http://www.upworthy.com/the-truth-about-gay-people

Oh yes.
And mind you, I don't really like Hilary.

Pride is Always Important

I feel bad that I failed to post anything for National Coming Out Day.  Life has been pretty hectic in many fronts and I will admit, blogging was one of the first few things that had to be put on hold.

But man I have to say this:

I am very pissed off and disappointed at how some have transformed the Annual Pride Event into a personal statement aimed at another organization.    While the rest of the world is talking about the importance of being heard, of making our presence welcome, and of showing unity, here in the Philippines the very group that once clamored on the importance of participating in the Annual Pride March has taken the most inane direction in this year's Pride Events.

I'll let you see the post here:
http://www.taskforcepride.com/

Now, had it been a statement saying "Marching is NOT the ONLY WAY to celebrate Pride" then I would applaud it for reminding the Pink Community of the many other ways one can show support and commemorate the sacrifices and challenges that were faced back in the Stonewall Riots.  But no, the group is instead claiming that marching is not necessary.

After years of saying it was.  All those times before, the push was, "How do we encourage people to march?"  "How do we remind people if they don't feel they are represented in the Pride March, then they should go to BE represented."  Suddenly now it is all you don't have to march?  Bullshit.

Why?  Because SOMEONE ELSE IS HANDLING THIS YEAR'S PRIDE MARCH EVENT.
And rather than be supportive of it, or perhaps still have a second march people can also participate in, the group has decided to make a public statement claiming marching is not necessary.

Quite a huge CHANGE from what was being proclaimed back in July.

It is the same stupid slandering that was being bandied about during the White Party nights.  Many groups opted to host their own White Parties.  Think about that for a second:  MANY GROUPS WANT TO HOST THEIR OWN WHITE PARTIES.  That is a HUGE step in the right direction.  People are all celebrating in their own ways.  People are all making events to celebrate what used to be a  single event!  So now, every LGBT person in Metro Manila has the option to choose where it is more convenient.  Has the freedom to go where their friends opt to go.  Has the joy of being able to celebrate the night by visiting all the events they want!   Can you imagine?  Having such freedom of choice?  There was a time when having a party that celebrated gay freedoms had to be underground.  This was a good step.

And yet, the slander began.  "Not the REAL White Party"  and so on was thrown about.  As if a specific organization in the Philippines was the root of it all.  As if a specific location in the Philippines was the real reason the party was born.  As if Stonewall did not matter.

Selfish.  Idiotic.  Divisive.

Task Force Pride has become a force of personal pride, rather than a beacon of unity and colorful hope.
I am now embarrassed to know the people behind this direction.  (And yes, I want my book back.  You've borrowed it long enough.)

Very embarrassed.

My partner and I will still march at the upcoming Pride March in Quezon City this year.  We will still show our support to the Pink community.  We will still remind people that many of the freedoms and levels of acceptance that are now enjoyed were thanks to the people back in the past who took the courage and effort to MARCH and to SPEAK UP.

https://www.facebook.com/pridecouncil

True Pride was never about "who gets the credit" for an event.
And that's but one of the many things a certain group has to learn about truly being a voice for a community.

Now THAT's an EVENT I'd support!

Loving how O Bar has brought back the PRIDE in celebrating Pride Month!
Entrance is free.  Everyone is welcome.

And the event is having on-site HIV Counseling and Testing.

While there are still some concerns, such as some posters don't seem that well-laid out (or too many fonts were used), some grammar concerns (Shouldn't it be "BecauseTrue Love and Pride are for free" instead of is?)  and how some of the text blasts in social media seem to be obsessing over abusing the use of the Exclamation Point (!) I'm over all very happy with how this event has been approached.   A lot more professional and polished and worth being proud of.

Let's celebrate PRIDE!

[review] CONFUSED Volume 1 by TKO

So, among the many fun memories and cool stuff we got during this year's Pride March, Rocky and I also found a booth that was selling a bunch of indie comics, poetry and fiction zines.  Being a writer and artist myself, I felt the duty to support their work and give them my honest review/reaction to it.  After all, when I write and draw my stuff, I love being able to share it with others and even more so, hear from those who checked it out.

Tonight, I'm starting with CONFUSED Volume 1, which is a black and red two-tone comic by Trizha Ko (or TKO).  (A quick peek at the creator's tumblr reveals a healthy body of work which makes me feel shy and envious of not having been as prolific.

 

The comic is 16 pages long, and opens with "Why I Don't Like Talking To Myself" which I found to be a nice honest story.  I know I've found myself in such a situation many times in the past.  I loved how the word balloons were used in that story since they really captured the idea that was being presented.

"The Real Purpose Of Bras" followed, where we meet Melba Roast and learn of her three points on the issue.  The lack of actual "editing" is clear once you notice the addition of text in secondary world balloon that did not fit the earlier balloon, or the drawn-over corrections on some text portions.  This does not distract too much from the humor, though, of the piece.  (I did especially find fun the speech bubble nipple.)  Still, I kinda felt a tad let down that the story had to end with the last panel being duplicated twice, as if just to fill in the page.  If there was a deeper reason behind it, I didn't quite catch it.  I could have imagined it being repeated to suggest "free breasts" but that didn't seem to be the intention either.  (Yes, I know, I'm probably trying to read too much into it.)

The third story, "Androphobia" rotates the layout 90 degrees, and is nicely mostly wordless save for some panels.  I have to admit, I liked the non-realism of it all, with characters shifting into caricature faces as they blabbered about things and used their words to literally attack one another.

The fourth one, "Androphobia Part II" revists the characters but adds word balloons.    The use of red ink is nicely played here, and I have to admit, I admired the effort in creating all those textures and patterns to push the narrative and panel composition.

"Androphobia Part III" I felt was the weakest of the three.  Although it contains my favorite page.   This felt kind of rushed.  Or at least... "hilaw pa yung idea" and could have done a bit more incubating before being set down in ink.

"A Blind Man's World" was visually lovely, although I felt missed a mark when the last panel had the blind person mention the other's name.  I guess I always felt that blind people tend to develop their hearing better than their touch, when it came to identifying people.  But then again, what would I really know?

"To my Compromising lover" is a poem that follows with a small piece of support artwork in the corner.  The poem is interesting but I felt could have benefited from more show than tell.  Then again, I'm no published poet, so maybe its a great piece and I just don't know how to grasp it.

Afterwards, its mostly "Some Bonus Stuff you can rip out and hang on your wall" which features everything from a nicely detailed butt "magic" shot, to sketches "with Tads Tejada."  The sketches were nice, but given I did not know this Tads Tejada nor the creator of the comic, I felt they literally were just fillers instead of an opportunity to give the reader a chance to get to know the creator more (I guess I've been spoiled by DVD extras, eh?)  The "cover" to Androphobia was odd.  I felt it didn't carry the mood of the first three comics.  The "Prick" pages were kinda meh, as was the Venus with hand studies, but I will commend the artist for really having the determination to illustrate hair.  I usually just sketch a shape and fill it in with black.  The lats few pages were okay, I guess.  But admittedly, I felt the pages were kinda wasted opportunities to share more work, reach out more to the reader, or offer something more substantial given this wasn't exactly a free comic.

All in all, CONFUSED Volume One felt like its title.  It felt like there was an inspired attempt to create a comic to be shared to readers, but halfway through, simply because something that had to be filled up.  If that was the intentional message and reason for the comic's state, then I guess that worked.  But it did leave me, as a costumer who paid for the book, feeling cheated.    The stories within are quirky and definitely worth a read if you have time, but not what I'd mention if I were to be asked to recommend an indie comic to others.   The artwork shows huge promise (and in some cases I feel better than mine) but I do wish frames and panels were utilized better (as well as either a great letterer or computer-assisted lettering) to make the whole thing easier to actually read.

Comparing this to the creator's upcoming work, Bubble Gumball Girl! feels very wrong given how much more the upcoming project feels like a valid piece that is being truly invested with the creator's creative juices.

I'd love to read more of Trizha Ko's stuff, thanks to having seen the tumblr.  But had I only had this comic to rely on, I would have said, "That was nice.  Next please."

What have you done to truly celebrate PRIDE?

At my work place, I realized most if not all of them were not really aware of the significance of the Pride Month for people in my community.  So I decided to share the celebrations with them, rather than leave them in the dark about our struggle for recognition, equality and respect.

I bought a very large pizza for everyone to share and enjoy and to those who were interested, shared with them the story of the Stonewall Riots of 1969 and how it became an iconic event in the fight for equality.

True, this ain't much.  Yes, maybe most of them didn't really care.  But who knows, maybe some of them do and some of them suddenly realize why it is important for people like me to always desire equal rights.

Pride is about never stopping the fight to be seen as equals.
It isn't about making a quick buck just cause you know many gay people love to party.

What have YOU done to truly celebrate Pride?

Happy Pride 2012!

Why am I NOT joining the "White Party" in Malate this year?

More Pictures from 2011's Pride March

Special thanks to my partner for life, Rocky, for these pictures.
Love the green pins we got for that day (even with the awkward English)
"I want a Marriage Too!"

Check out the whole album !

We joined this year's Pride March in the Philippines!

rOckY and I, with a LOT of our good friends, took part in this year's Pride March.  This was my second time to be part of the march since last year, I was with my parents and family on a trip to Singapore.  My best friend Tom and his partner Fritz was there, as was my dear diva Grace and her partner Pao, as was Geoff and Allan.  (Thank you Allan for these wonderful pictures!)  rOckY has yet to release our own set of pictures but once those are up, know I'll be sharing the link to them too.

There were many other friends who joined us that day who aren't in these pictures.  Nono, Lanchie, Juna, Markee, Ian, Bern, Pao and so many other friends also made their presence known and their voices heard as we marched down the road with pink balloons, rainbows and love.  Of course, there were protesters against the march there too which was expected.   A little bird told us before that those people are "funded" to protest by certain groups.  Sad really, that people really think hate is the way to live one's life.   There also were companies that showed their support (but part of me does wonder how much is support and how much is selling the idea that you can work for them.  Oh well, businesses will always have the bottom line after all.)   You can find more pictures of the beautiful event here as well.

Check out this video that rOckY took of the march.  Clearly, we were having a LOT of fun.

As I mentioned in my facebook, the Pride March doesn't require attendees to be gay.  All you have to be is someone who wants to voice out that LGBT deserve equal rights.  

Among my many posts include:

Will I see you today, marching alongside me? Will I see you today, being brave enough to make a statement that being who I am is okay?  Or will I have to wait for the day I become a victim of some hate crime before you realize I need your support to have my rights recognized?
Will you March with me this year?

And

Yes, embracing DIVERSITY does mean embracing even the presence of things you don't necessarily like. But that's the beauty of Diversity! There's always something for everyone.

And

Join this year's Pride March. Help show more people that there is nothing to be ashamed about being gay, knowing someone who is gay, being friends with someone who is gay, or simply believing that we all deserve to have the equal right to love who we love.
Help us make a statement. Help us be heard. Hindi lang ang mahirap ang nangangailan ng supporta ninyo. (Not only the poor need your support.)

I do hope next year we get to see even more friends take part in this important event.  I pray that more friends find the courage to join us as we represent the people in the Philippines who believe in equal rights, who believe in the freedom to be happy, and who believe that love is real.

Happy Pride!
See you next year!

Happy Pride Everyone!

I'm Antonio Gabriel A. Abad IV, 34 years old

and I am proud to be a bisexual man in an committed, honest, loving gay relationship 

with my partner, Rocky Sunico.

(Rocky, me and our friend's baby.)

Happy Pride Everyone!

At our favorite haunt.

Being wacky while travelling.

The plaaaaane!

Attending a friend's wedding.

Geeking out with my dad over the Star Trek movie.

My first ever picture of Rocky.

Me on our second night of hanging out.

Proud of you Zac!

He sums up a lot in this statement:

"In light of Jamey's death -- it became clear to me in an instant that living a gay life without publicly acknowledging it -- is simply not enough to make any significant contribution to the immense work that lies ahead on the road to complete equality. Our society needs to recognize the unstoppable momentum toward unequivocal civil equality for every gay lesbian bisexual and transgendered citizen of this country."

He continues, "I believe in the power of intention to change the landscape of our society -- and it is my intention to live an authentic life of compassion and integrity and action."

Glad you've decided to join us and be among those who are proud to be who we are, Zac.

May your move inspire even more people to come out as well.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/10/16/zachary-quinto-comes-out-gay_n_1013815.html?ref=fb&src=sp&comm_ref=false#sb=538413,b=facebook

Be proud. Come out. Stand tall.

DADT (Don't Ask, Don't Tell) has finally ended.  And we can see how many are embracing the joy of having the freedom and the right to come out and be themselves.  Sad and ironic how in other places, like Manila, so many are still too afraid to come out and be proud of who they are.  While the rest of the world struggles for the right to be proud of who they are, and for the safety of identifying themselves as gay without a mob literally out to kill them, here we have people who claim "coming out is unimportant" and talk of being recognized as gay as something to be ashamed of.

I am proud to have come out.
Yes, it hasn't been an absolutely smooth ride.  Yes, my parents were hurt by the truth, since they did want their son to be straight and have children.  But still, there is strength in being recognized for who you are.  There is courage in being able to stand up for yourself and say, "I am proud to be me."  And there are stronger and deeper bonds that form when your parents learn the truth, and now relate to you with the proper knowledge, and eventually, understanding of who you are as a whole.


I really hope more people realize staying hidden in the closet is no way to truly live.
And I do hope they realize this before it is too late.

I don't get Miss Universe

I know, I know, I shouldn't rant about something I don't like when so many others do and it does so much more good out there in the world.  But honestly, I don't get all the hooplah over the Miss Universe pageant.  Currently on both facebook and in many social networks, the running joke is that a "official holiday for gay people" is about to happen or that "all gay employees can request for their sick leave/vacation leave today" with the joke being: Every gay guy loves to watch Miss Universe.

Yeah.  Everyone knows what a Miss Universe contestant looks like.

The thing is, I don't.
And I am definitely not straight.
Is it because I am more bisexual than just gay?  Maybe it has to do with me seeing beauty pageants as events that celebrate being a specific kind of beauty, and represents glamour and grace as a specific way of acting, and the whole event and all feels very unnecessary and frivolous.  And admittedly, it has to do with my dislike of how all this has lead to things like this event which seems to glamorize and support doing this to one's children.

Seriously.  And some of these poor children take botox now.  Ugh.

Beauty will always, for me, be something everyone has.
Some may have beauty that coincides with what more people define as beautiful than others, while others might have a beauty that takes a more open-minded or less brain-washed mind.    I have strong feelings against any group, production or form of media that highlights and celebrates only ONE kind of beauty.  Not everyone has to be thin.  Not every woman needs that hour-glass figure to be beautiful.  But it seems in as much as these pageants harp about "Inner beauty" they do nothing but demonstrate more and more the need to confirm to their definition of beauty.

Maybe if Miss Universe had a wider range of body types.
And celebrations of beauty. 

Take away their heads and you'll see the same body type and the same beauty stylings on each and every single contestant.  Hairstyles, racial traits and talents may differ, but everyone seems to try to be the same kind of woman, waving in the same exact way, smiling with the same "perfect" smile.

All The Same.

I embrace individuality.  I embrace identity.  I embrace being brave enough to tell yourself "you are beautiful" and being willing to stand out and be different.   Now I am sure there are those out there who will greatly disagree with me.  Many would definitely say I missed the "point" of Miss Universe.   Some would definitely harp about how Miss Universe is about reaching for one's dreams and knowing we can all "be better".   But I will always say, "Being better" is not the same as "Being healthier".   Wanting to work out because you care about your health and want to look more fit is fine and commendable.  But doing it because you believe you are ugly unless you look like some beauty pageant contestant?  Unacceptable.

Why indeed?

Ultimately, this is just me ranting about it.  I don't get all the buzz and fuss over it.  I don't get the excitement it supposedly contains.  I guess for me, Miss Universe is like golf.  Or the UAAP games.  Ultimately, just not my thing.

Any this kind of thinking starts to become the norm.
Anyone who wants to celebrate being distinct rather than the same, is automatically labelled a negative thing.

So to all you fans who, for some reason are reading my blog, enjoy Miss Universe - Enjoy the show and I hope your "bet" wins.  But please, don't try to convince me of the "virtues" of the show.  You'd probably have a bigger chance turning me into a homophobic straight guy.

Check out: Baduy Pride!

Allow me to invite you all to Baduy Pride, http://www.baduypride.com/ a blog my partner, Rocky, and I have created in order to share and celebrate the joy of being Baduy! (Baduy = corny, cheesy, sappy, etc) Hope you guys start following the site!

See you there!

The (Unofficial) White Party of 2011!

Saturday marked the date for what was supposed to be the White Party celebration here in Manila, but the night before had a storm named Falcon (warning, NSFW link here) showing up and drowning many parts of the city under almost half a meter of water.  In what seems to slowly becoming a growing tradition for me and Rocky, we decided to come up with cool shirts we can wear for the event.  As I mentioned in my previous post, I wanted to find a design which celebrated both our geekiness and our gayness at the same time!

But sadly, thanks to the porn-studio-named typhoon, the official White Party was declared cancelled and was to be rescheduled on a different day.  Rocky and I, however, found ourselves still wanting to celebrate that night due to many reasons:  New York just legalized Gay Marriage, The Stonewall Riots were still an event to be remembered and celebrated, and our friend was still going to our favorite haunt, O bar, to introduce us to her partner.

So yeah, we pushed through with our "unofficial" White Party and wore our lovely shirts.  Here they are!

Blurry pic care of the elevator mirror.

For those who were curious, or aren't geek enough to grasp it, yes, the shirt designs were inspired by the PlayStation Portable game called Patapon.

Rocky's shirt.

And mine.

The best part?  The quote in the back of the shirt is an actual quote from the game!   To make the design, I actually had to dig around the net for two things:  high resolution images of the Patapons, and a font typeface of the font they actually use in the game.   The Patapons I was able to find, but not in the size I actually needed.  So to make it work for the design, I had to redraw the figures in Photoshop.   The font was more interesting.  There were files of the letters, but no actual font that I could find.  Many sites suggested directions on how to convert the file to a font, but I couldn't make any sense of it.  So what did I do?

I actually had to find ways to push the size of the text images to a high resolution and keep sharpening it for the design.  Thankfully, I got it to work!

Spank Them Bottoms!

Horror of horrors though, I worked on the Patapons too much to realize the big mistake that was present in the shirt designs.  The mistake?  Well, I used the WRONG RAINBOW.  The rainbow I had used was actually the traditional rainbow with all seven colors.  Ironic that I'd overlook that detail considering I had to actually redo the rainbow as well as the bisexual triangle icon for the high resolution needs of the design.

Proud to be Geeky and Gay!

Still, I feel pretty proud of our White Party shirts.  They weren't as big a hit with the people present as our Katamari Damacy inspired shirts before, but what mattered most was we loved wearing them.   In a celebration of being proud of who you are, wearing a shirt that you didn't just buy off the rack feels fantastic.

Hmm must start working out again.  I don't fill shirts like I used to.

It does make me wonder... come next Pride, what do we wear next!

Suggestions are always welcome :-P

Happy White Party!
Happy Gay Pride!

Celebrate the Freedom to Love!

Here's to celebrating IDAHO (International Day Against Homophobia and Transphobia) this May 17.
http://www.dayagainsthomophobia.org

A friend shared to me this link of how Singapore is taking part in it.  I only wish there was also a more visible way Pinoys can take part in the celebration.

Even Lady Gaga herself is participating.  Here's her quote on the event:

"That Humanity could find Togertherness. We are all different and it is that which makes us the same.  Be yourself, love who you are and be proud. You were born this way, baby."

I'm hoping to take part in the As I Am campaign.  Probably gonna tell Rocky about it once he wakes up.  While I may have had a long part of my life denying who I was and hating who I am, I am proud to have finally come to a point where I can celebrate being me and have no fears of whether or not the world will accept me.

I am me.

My name is Tobie Abad, and I am a bisexual, and I am not afraid to love who I love.

I only hope you can say you have the freedom to love too.

Not my thing, but still YAY!

... but I'm happy we now live in a world where such artists CAN exist.

Love me.  Hate me.  Want me.
I don't care.

I do wish the had a masculine bear in the group though.
But that's just me.  Enjoy the sassy twinks, you all!

Sometimes, you just gotta...

Found this at WickedGayBlog.
Originally from Deliciously Queer & Sinful.

We Need More People Like Her

My hat goes off to you, Ma'am.
We need more people like you in the world.

Here's hoping for more people to open their eyes and hearts to the truth.
Enough with living in fear and hate and discrimination.
I challenge you all to be part of building a better tomorrow.

I'm Better than I've Ever Been. Can you say the same?

Christmas has just zoomed passed us and in a few more days 2010 will be bidding us farewell.  Who would have thought time can move so quickly when you are having this much fun.  To be honest, I still find myself at times pinching myself to make sure I'm not caught in a dream or lost in some food-induced ecstatic vision.  The number of things that I had accomplished in this year alone are quite overwhelming, to be honest.  It was almost as if I had been stagnating for so long and had never really noticed it.

Merry Christmas from us!

But I guess life is really like that.  There are the ups and downs, the zig zags and the u-turns, the humps and the rapid roads that fast-track us through what we are meant to experience.  There are the scenic routes and the dumpy boring ones.  There are the long agonizing treks that move past galleries of regrets and frustrations.  And there are the wonderful stop overs that are there to remind you, "Hey you deserve this!" that quietly then hitch along for a ride as you go through your life.

Life is like Inception.
Confusing.

Let's face it:  Life can be challenging enough as it is.   From academic to economic expectations, dealing with the pressures of school and work are already a lot for some people.   Add to that the pressures from siblings, friends, and parents who all (well, at least the real ones) really just want was is best for you.    Then finally, add the delicate act of sharing and yet respecting boundaries that is necessary for a relationship to remain healthy and not dip into either obsession or abuse.  Life is pretty challenging enough as it is.

Add to that the discrimination from both others and one's peers for being gay.
And for being a geek.

Trust me, you guys have it easier :-P

And trust me, it can be a far greater challenge than most would expect.

But in many ways, this never-ending challenge of embracing one's true self, and celebrating it with the world, is what makes life worth living.  It is only when one is able to say, "Hey, look!  This is me and I love being me!" can one start to honestly consider finding that special someone else whom one can share one's life with.  Cause one has to be very careful out there.  There are a lot of predators, users, and abusers out there who would not really feel any moral obligation to care about how easily they manipulate your naïveté to their advantage.   A large part of knowing how to avoid such people is to learn to trust yourself first and to love yourself for who you are.   Once you do, the adage like-attracts-like easily comes into play and before you know it, you will find someone who "gets" you as much as you "get" him too.

Really.  No.  Don't go there.

So yes, 2011 is inching its way closer with barely a week left of time remaining.  Lots of people talk about having a "resolution" this new year.  Others mumble about trying to accomplish a list of goals.  Me?  I think what would be best is to review one's life and consider what one has done to be both oneself and at the same time an even better version of oneself.    Others might be content to judge the joy in the lives by the branded things they buy, or the free trips out-of-town they connive out of others... don't mislead yourself into thinking they have it "better".  After all, all they've done is measure the quality of their lives on financial means.  Celebrate being you and celebrating always becoming even a better you each and every single day!

Year of the Rabbit is coming up!

Here's to another year filled with real rainbows that color the sky!

*Thanks to my partner Rocky for some of the pictures!

---

George Washington
Associate yourself with men of good quality if you esteem your own reputation. It is better be alone than in bad company.